Seeing Double: On A Bilingual Glasgow University Experience

English might be one of the most spoken languages internationally, so, in France, we started learning it early on – but it was not one of my priorities. That is, not until I discovered the world of cinema and became obsessed with English-speaking Hollywood. I decided that to work in this industry, I had to become fluent in English. With lots of help and effort in learning English through media and literature, I managed to become fluent enough to gain a place at Glasgow for the international study I had dreamt of. I’m no longer a fan of Hollywood culture, but there’s no doubt it helped me become bilingual and create a new identity. 

Language is a major element in shaping culture, forming identities, and transforming society. Each language relies on layers of cultural histories which build the contours of self and social environment. Being multilingual is therefore an exercise of the brain and mind – to mix 2 different cultures in 1 experience of self. Someone speaking 2 languages must read between the lines of words to build an identity suspended between 2 intertwined cultures. It’s common to hear people describe themselves as 2 different people, depending on which language they speak. Being bilingual can confuse identity formation and leave you questioning your place in both cultures.

Doctors and researchers have studied multilingualism in an effort to understand how our brain integrates multiple languages, and have rejected many myths about multilingualism. Some now disproven theories include multilingualism confusing the brain, increasing chances of developing anxiety, and slowing reflection development. Research undertaken by Naja Ferjan Ramirez on multilingual babies has instead shown that they have the same vocabulary development as babies learning 1 language; however they often mix terms or invent words using both languages. Their brain is specialised to process both languages, which can provoke confusion, and create a struggle to be understood by the social environment, or by themselves. In this case, the problem isn’t their bilingualism, but more the fact that not everyone is. 

Based on my personal experience, I speak very differently when I speak in English than in French. First, because speaking English implies a different rhythm which makes my voice a higher pitch. Moreover, learning English with literature made me speak with words used in writing pieces, and created a distance in conversations. Humour is slightly different in English – due to my lack of cultural references, sometimes conversations end up as frustrating misunderstandings. I therefore once again rely more on facial expressions and tone to express my humour in English, whereas in French I use wordplay a lot more.

 In general, my experience of being bilingual in Scotland has not been as challenging as I thought it would be, especially because the University of Glasgow accepts many international students whose first language isn’t English. This makes it easier for me to socialise with other international people, which helps me feel less lonely. Together, we share a common experience, and feel recognised and supported. I didn’t find it hard to make friends or socialise, though I did socialise with different references in an effort to fit into a new environment that could not fully understand me (as much as I could not fully understand others). Today, I still struggle to communicate some feelings or concepts that I have processed in French, but cannot seem to find the right words for in English. When discussing something I am engaged or passionate about, I can never express it entirely because some words don’t come automatically, leaving me feeling frustrated and angry.

  Despite this, I do think it is harder for someone coming from outside of Europe and Western culture to adapt to a new culture with entirely different perceptions, education, and ways of living. Coming from Europe and almost a bordering country, I understand that my integration is not as difficult or radical a change as people coming from China, India, or Japan, with very different traditions and languages. Because Scotland is an English speaking country, it has been normalised that international people are the ones who must adapt, leading to solitude, exclusion, and an identity crisis for not fitting into the Western mould. The English language as a basis for communication has been taken for granted for too long, and it is time that the Western world learns to adapt and understand other cultures rich in history and valuable for, not in spite of, their differences. 

Bilingualism has brought me a lot. It’s allowed me to experience a different face of the world, and explore a different culture. Even if Scotland remains very close to France, I distinguish them as 2 different parts of me, and they have both contributed to my identity and sense of self. Nonetheless, it can be hard to express ideas and opinions when a language relies on a very different structure. Being misunderstood or experiencing a sense of disconnection isn’t rare, and is more likely if you come from a country outside of the Western world. In light of this, when we consider bilingualism, it’s important to understand the value of difference and diversity, both culturally and linguistically. When we insist on the dominance of the English language, we lose out on amazing connections, art, and culture.